Facebook Status: One of my favourite pastimes is imagining politicians trying to get away with the same shenanigans in their mother’s home.

Facebook Status: If you could only eat one food for an entire week, what food would you choose?

Facebook Status: If you had to be an animal, which would you choose and why?

Facebook Status: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of the act.

Facebook Status: Give a person a fish and you’ll feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Facebook Status: Don’t ruin a good day because of a bad yesterday.